


after the fire is over (found my innocence lost)

by OsleyaKomWonkru



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alcohol, Apologies, Cookies, Episode: s06e13 The Blood of Sanctum, Fix-It, Gen, Healing, Octavia helps Madi and Jordan cope, Underage Drinking, Understanding, and a lot of talking, because they understand each other, let these three have a scene dammit, mentions of cannibalism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-15
Updated: 2019-08-15
Packaged: 2020-09-01 14:36:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,912
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20259694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OsleyaKomWonkru/pseuds/OsleyaKomWonkru
Summary: In the aftermath of the Battle of Sanctum, Octavia postpones going to the Anomaly. She sees that Jordan and Madi are in pain from their recent experiences, and it is a pain that she is well familiar with. A pain that only those who grew up "under the floor" can really understand.She needs to help them.Octavia looked down to where her brother was talking to Jordan. She couldn’t hear what they were talking about, but it was clear from the confusion on Bellamy’s face that it wasn’t the conversation he was expecting. Jordan looked haunted, but all Bellamy could do was pat him on the shoulder and head on to embrace Clarke.“Time to go.” Gabriel said as he came up beside her.Octavia didn’t say anything, but kept her eyes on Madi as everyone around her embraced each other, lost in their own little worlds. The young Heda looked as haunted as Jordan did, pushed aside as everyone else reunited with people they loved and cared about“I can’t go yet.”





	after the fire is over (found my innocence lost)

**Author's Note:**

> So this fic was inspired by [this gifset](https://the-suns-also-rise.tumblr.com/post/186864991187/innocence-lost) and can be said to be the fic version of the meta ["The Girls Under the Floor and the Boy From Space: Isolated Upbringings and the Terror of Loss"](https://osleyakomwonkru.tumblr.com/post/186605073302/the-girls-under-the-floor-and-the-boy-from-space) that I wrote several weeks ago.
> 
> I need Octavia to come back from the Anomaly to help Madi and Jordan, if for no other reason. Madi's Gone Through Some Shit this season, as has Jordan (and he looks set to have even more coming), and they could really benefit from Octavia's experience and wisdom in these matters. And we all know that helping others helps Octavia heal too, so thus this fic was born :D

Octavia stood on one of the roof balconies, looking between Gabriel’s sketch of her tattoo and the approaching crowd of Wonkru, winding their way up the mountain from the transport ship. She saw Clarke’s bright blonde hair, the smaller dark-haired figure holding tight to her hand, and knew at once that it was Madi.

From what Miller and Murphy had said, Madi had gone through quite the ordeal herself since arriving in Sanctum - believing she lost Clarke, being possessed by _Sheidheda,_ the Dark Commander, and then he used her to enact vengeance on the Primes so that he could rule Sanctum instead.

They made it sound as if it was all _Sheidheda’s_ doing, but Octavia doubted it was that simple. She’d never had the Flame, of course, but she’d spent enough time learning about it and the Commanders in the bunker with Gaia. She knew all about the Dark Commander, she knew how the Flame worked, and she knew that _Sheidheda_ wouldn’t have been able to emerge like he did if Madi hadn’t on some level _wanted_ it. A heavy burden to bear for one so young, but one she could certainly relate to.

As Wonkru made the final turn leading up to the steps, Octavia watched Bellamy, Echo and Gabriel come down the palace steps to meet them. Gabriel looked up at her and veered off from them, probably coming to get her so they could head back to the Anomaly. Ever since he’d seen the tattoo, that was the only thing on his mind.

Octavia looked down to where her brother was talking to Jordan. She couldn’t hear what they were talking about, but it was clear from the confusion on Bellamy’s face that it wasn’t the conversation he was expecting. Jordan looked _haunted,_ but all Bellamy could do was pat him on the shoulder and head on to embrace Clarke.

“Time to go.” Gabriel said as he came up beside her.

Octavia didn’t say anything, but kept her eyes on Madi as everyone around her embraced each other, lost in their own little worlds. The young _Heda_ looked as haunted as Jordan did, pushed aside as everyone else reunited with people they loved and cared about.

“I can’t go yet.” Octavia heard herself say.

“What do you mean?”

“My people need me.”

“I’m sure they’re in good hands.”

Octavia turned to him, shaking her head. “No. Not all of them. There’s - well, without going into a full history, let’s just say, I used to be unique. Special.”

“You are special, Octavia.”

“Yeah.” She scoffed. “The tattoo. I know. And I know how much it matters to you. But this - how I was raised, how I grew up, it used to be only me. There wasn’t anyone who understood what things were like for me, growing up only ever knowing my mother and my brother until I was sixteen years old. Never seeing another person, never speaking to one. But things are different now. Madi, Jordan - they’ve grown up much the same way as I did. I’m not alone anymore. They’ve been through some horrible things the past few weeks, and - the others won’t understand. They _can’t._ But I can. And after everything I’ve been through, if I can use my experience to help them, I should. I’m sorry. The Anomaly will have to wait.”

Gabriel nodded. “I’ve been waiting a hundred and fifty years for answers. I guess it isn’t the end of the world if I have to wait a bit longer.”

“Thank you.”

Octavia handed him the drawing of her tattoo, and headed down the stairs, weaving through the crowd of Sanctum residents and Wonkru to find Madi, still standing by herself as Clarke found herself ensconced in a group with Bellamy, Echo and Jackson.

“Octavia!” Madi exclaimed, tired excitement in her voice, though that excitement didn’t reach her eyes.

_“Heda.”_ Octavia inclined her head.

“Not anymore.” Madi said, looking at the ground. “I - to get rid of _Sheidheda,_ he’d grown too strong, but I - the Flame, they had to - it’s gone. The Flame’s gone.” She stammered, tears in her eyes when she looked back up at Octavia. “A hundred years of Commanders, and they’re all gone because of me.”

“Hey. It’s okay. _You’re_ okay. That’s what matters.”

Madi threw herself at Octavia, hugging her tightly. Shocked for a moment, Octavia returned the hug, feeling Madi begin to sob into her shoulder.

“It’s okay, Madi.” Octavia whispered, rubbing the younger girl’s back. “It’s okay.”

“No, it’s not. I let him in, I - I was so angry at them that they took Clarke, and - and now all these people are dead, and it’s my fault, and -”

“It’s not your fault.”

“It is. If - if I hadn’t killed Miranda Prime and tried to kill Priya, none of this would have happened. Now Clarke’s lost her mom, and that’s because of me.”

“Abby’s dead?”

Madi nodded, stepping back, looking at everyone around them. Octavia recognized the look, she was clearly uncomfortable with all of the people around them. Too many people to deal with, too many people that could hear her talking.

“Come with me.” Octavia said, gesturing up to the roof balcony she’d been standing on. “I know a place we can go.”

Madi took Octavia’s hand and let her lead them back through the crowd, up to the deserted balcony above. They sat down, hanging their legs over the edge, looking out over the fields and the forest.

“I was so angry that the Primes took Clarke.” Madi started. “And even though Bellamy said he’d find a way to save her, I - I couldn’t believe it. I couldn’t trust that his plan would work. It was a long shot, so many things could go wrong. I didn’t want to risk it when there was a surer way. It was _Clarke.”_

“I get it. Believe me, I do.”

Madi chanced a small smile. “So many people say that, but you’re the only one I actually believe. You know what it’s like, to have your whole life be one person.”

“Well, two, growing up, but close enough.”

“Close enough.” Madi looked down at the milling crowds. “None of them get it. None of them really know how it feels, to lose who has been the only person in their life for so long. I mean, I don’t remember my parents anymore, not really. I understand what they did for me, and I had some pictures that Clarke drew when I told her about them when we first met, but that’s all. I only really remember Clarke.”

“That’s fair.”

“So when she was taken from me - I mean, Bellamy, Echo, they - they were _sad_ for me, but they didn’t get it. And they didn’t want to listen to me. They didn’t want to understand. The only one who listened to me was _Sheidheda._ He told me what I wanted to hear. He gave me the answers. And - and I haven’t told anyone else this, but I _wanted_ them. I wanted what he told me. I _wanted_ the Primes to suffer like I was suffering. I could have stopped him at any time, but until we got up on that ship and Clarke was about to shoot herself - I didn’t _want_ to.” Madi turned to Octavia with desperate eyes. “Does that make me a bad person?”

“No.” Octavia reassured her. “It makes you human. When you’re in pain, you can’t see past that. The pain is all you see. And unless there’s someone there to help pull you out of that pain - it is almost impossible to see past it on your own. I know that better than anyone.”

“You’ve never let an evil Commander take over because it was easier to have him run the show than to deal with the pain yourself.”

Octavia gave her a look. “I didn’t need an evil Commander for that. I made my own.”

“I’m sorry Bellamy left you in the forest. That was wrong of him.”

“He did what he thought he had to do.”

“He should have helped you. I - if I hadn’t been paralyzed, I would have stopped him. Maybe if he hadn’t have done that, if you’d been here - things would have been different. We could have helped each other.”

“We could have. But what’s done is done.”

“You seem happier now compared to when we were on the mothership. How did you see past the pain?”

“Diyoza and I were stuck in quicksand. She held a gun to my head and asked me if I wanted to die. I told her to do it. She didn’t. Instead she told me about how she’d been there herself once. Then the temporal flare came, and - and I decided I wanted to live. I sank beneath the quicksand to save myself, and she dug me back out after.” Octavia gave Madi another knowing look. “I don’t recommend that method.”

“Where is Diyoza?”

“I don’t know.” Octavia looked across the forest to where she could see the green of the Anomaly on the horizon. “She walked into the Anomaly. I followed her. I came back, she didn’t. But last night we discovered I have a tattoo on my back that is the key to something related to the Anomaly, and - maybe that will be the key to getting her back, I don’t know.”

“I like her. I hope you can get her back.”

“Me too.”

They were quiet for a minute, watching everything going on below them, where no one seemed to be looking for them. Either Clarke had seen them and wasn’t worried, or she had other things on her mind, Octavia didn’t know, but they’d all disappeared off somewhere into Sanctum.

“I wonder how long it will take until Clarke realizes it is all my fault.” Madi said. “That her mom is dead.”

“She won’t blame you, Madi.”

“She should. After I tried killing the Primes, they locked us all up. They wanted to burn everyone at the stake - except me, because I’m a _natblida,_ so I could be one of their hosts, they didn’t want to kill me. Then they realized that if they shared how to make it from existing _natblidas,_ then that could save them - so Abby and Jackson started taking my bone marrow to do that.”

“They took your bone marrow against your will?” Octavia asked incredulously.

Madi nodded. “Then when it started to become too much, Abby injected herself with one of the doses, making her a _natblida_ too, so she could take the last remaining doses from herself, instead of from me. Then Russell took that opportunity to mindjack her.” She buried her face in her hands. “If I hadn’t have killed the Primes, they wouldn’t have done that. She wouldn’t have tried to save me, she - she’s dead because of me.”

“Oh, Madi…” Octavia pulled Madi into her side, kissing the top of her head as she held her. “You can’t blame yourself. You can’t. Abby did what any parent would do to save their child - or grandchild, in this case. She would have known the risks. Known that she was making herself a target. It was her chance to make up for everything she’s done.”

“Like making you shoot those people during the Dark Year so they wouldn’t feel guilty about eating human flesh?”

“How do you know about that?”

“Abby told me and Clarke when we were in Shallow Valley. She was sick from the pills, and while we were helping her get better, she told us what happened.”

“That’s not a story you should have had to hear.”

“I had the Flame in my head. Experienced the lives of the other Commanders. Trust me when I say that’s not the worst story I’ve ever known.”

“Still. It is a horrible one, and not one I’m proud of. A long way from the girl under the floor who saved the human race that Clarke told you stories about.”

“I don’t think so. You saved them again, even when they didn’t want to be saved. And Abby regretted making you carry that burden alone. You were just a teenager, she shouldn’t have put it all on you, and she knew that.”

“Can’t change the past. All we can do is do better in the future.”

“Yeah.” Madi agreed. “I should apologize to Jordan. At least he made it out alive.”

“Apologize for what?”

“He got in the way when I tried to kill Priya. I accidentally stabbed him instead.” Madi sighed. “Another thing to add to the list of bad things.”

“Well, let’s go apologize.” Octavia said. “I need to apologize to him too. Not for stabbing him, but for other things. And then we need to remind him that we know how he feels. He’s not a girl under the floor, but close enough.”

“Yeah. I guess that’s true.”

Octavia and Madi went back down to ground level, weaving through the crowd until they came to the spot where Jordan stood with a number of Sanctum residents.

“Jordan.” Octavia said softly. “Hi.”

As he and the others around him looked towards her, they stepped back in a hurry, pulling Jordan with them, whispers of _“Demon!”_ as they looked at Madi. Madi stepped back a few paces when she saw Jordan backing away from her, the adjuster stepping in front of him.

“Keep that demon child away from him. He’s one of us now.” The adjuster hissed.

Octavia rolled her eyes. “She’s not a demon.”

“I did stab him.” Madi said in a small voice. “I can see why they think that. But I didn’t mean to.”

“No, you meant to stab Priya Prime, hallowed be her name.” The adjuster said. “Who has now left us again, because of your people.”

“I’m sorry, Jordan.” Madi pleaded. “I’m sorry for hurting you. I’m so sorry.”

Jordan didn’t say anything, he just looked at them both warily.

“Madi, can you give us a minute?” Octavia asked. “Go back up to where we were, and then we’ll come join you, okay?”

Madi nodded shakily, and Octavia turned to the adjuster. “And don’t you go near her.” She said, voice as sharp as a knife. “If you touch her, you answer to me. And I’d really rather not knock you out. Again. I just want to talk to Jordan.”

Octavia stepped forward, hands out to show she had no weapons - not that she needed them, if push came to shove - and moved closer to Jordan, and he let her pull him away from the group.

“Jordan.”

“Octavia.”

“I’m sorry about what I said about your father. I really am. We were friends, once.”

“I know. He told me those stories too. But he didn’t know what happened to you so that you weren’t that girl anymore.”

“A lot happened in those six years in the bunker. A lot of really awful things. And they change you.”

“Yeah.” Jordan said, voice flat. “I’m getting that. We’ve only been on the ground for what, nine days? And I already miss the life I had on the ship with my parents. My father gave us a second chance here, and for what? Look around you. Look at what we’ve done. And it’s all my fault.”

“Hey. Don’t say that.”

“But it is. I fell for this girl, Delilah - the girl who gave us drinks when we first got there, you were there. But then she became a Prime, and she didn’t know me anymore, and - and it was looking for those answers that we came across how it happened. What was happening here. And then we destroyed it. Their world wasn’t perfect, far from it, but - but it didn’t have the bloodshed we brought here. Maybe your brother was right, I shouldn’t have fallen for her so quickly, but -”

“It’s okay.” Octavia said, cutting him off, reaching out a hand to rub his shoulder. He started for a moment, but then accepted the touch. “Believe it or not, I understand how you feel. I get it. She… she was the only person who wanted to know you for you. Not for who your parents were. She didn’t see them when she looked at you, she only saw you. That can be powerful.”

Jordan blinked a few times. “How… I’ve been trying to explain that, but - no one seems to understand it.”

“Most people won’t.” Octavia admitted. “They… they live in a different world than we do. They don’t know what it’s like, to grow up only knowing a few people, then have your world suddenly expand yet still only be defined by them. Not having anyone who sees you for you. But then you find that one person who does, and… then you lose them. You lose the person who was your home, and people can’t understand that. They don’t know what it feels like.”

“But you do.” Jordan said, realization dawning on him. “You do.”

“Yeah.” Octavia nodded. “I’ve been there. _Madi’s_ been there. I know you two have your own complicated history now, but remember she’s like us. She recognizes your pain. So do I. We can help you. We can help each other. If you let us.”

Jordan glanced over to the Sanctum residents he’d been talking to, to the adjuster, who was still watching them carefully. He shook his head a few times, as if he was trying to clear it, and then looked back to Octavia.

“Yeah. I - I don’t know what this world has been doing to me. What _they’ve_ been doing to me. But I know whatever it is, it isn’t what my parents would have wanted.” He opened his palm, where Octavia saw a mind drive. “This is Priya. They want me to - to believe this is divine, but I know it isn’t. I know it is just technology. And it’s Priya, who was wearing Delilah’s body, it isn’t even Delilah. But why can’t I let go of it?”

“It’s the closest you have to her.” Octavia said sympathetically. “But maybe there can be something else. Did her parents survive the red sun toxin?”

“I think so. The tavern’s operating, so - so they must have.”

Octavia nodded. “Maybe they can give you something of Delilah’s to remember her by.”

“And a strong drink?”

“Yeah.” Octavia chuckled. “And a strong drink. Come on, let’s go get something, and then go join Madi, all right? It’ll do us all some good.”

Jordan nodded, and let Octavia guide him in the direction of the tavern. Octavia looked up to Madi, holding up a finger, letting her know they’d join her in a bit. Madi acknowledged her, understanding.

Blythe Ann was behind the counter of the tavern, expression sad, trying to keep busy. Octavia remembered having seen Blythe Ann stab Priya, stab her daughter’s body, and couldn’t even imagine what kind of pain the woman must have been in.

“Hi.” Jordan said to her nervously. “I’m so sorry. For everything.”

Blythe Ann smiled at him sadly. “It’s not your fault. I’m glad she had you, Jordan, if only for a short while. Is there something I can help you with?”

“I don’t know what will be happening now, to us, to any of us, but - I wanted to have something to remember her by. If there’s anything you’d be willing to part with. You don’t have to, of course, I’m sorry, I just -”

“It’s okay. Please, I want to share her life with you. No trouble at all. Just give me a moment, okay? Here, until I get back. For you and your friend.” Blythe Ann put two shotglasses and two plates with slices of some sort of food Octavia had never seen in front of them, and disappeared up the stairs into the living quarters.

“Care for some Jo Berry Pie?” Jordan asked Octavia. “It’s good.”

“Sure.”

Octavia took her first bite, and closed her eyes with a sigh of pleasure, trying to feel the sweet taste to its fullest, taking another bite as quickly as she could swallow the first. She’d never tasted anything like it before, not on the Ark, not on Earth, certainly not in the bunker. She hadn’t thought she’d ever experience _joy_ with food, not after never having enough her entire life.

“That was my reaction the first time too.” Jordan said when Octavia opened her eyes again, half her plate already cleared. “After living on algae my entire life, well… it was certainly different.”

“I believe it.” Octavia said. “You’re lucky you had algae though. That’s not something we had in the bunker.”

“That’s a question my father always had. What happened in there so that you wouldn’t trust how his algae could restore the farm. Why you burned it all down.”

Octavia put down her fork and picked up the shotglass, downing the alcohol, feeling it burn in her throat as she grimaced from the taste. “It’s not a pleasant story. I don’t know if you want to hear it.”

“Can I share a theory he had?”

“Feel free.”

“A lot of people died in there. And my father always said that he understood that you had to do things to survive. And that you’d said that the farm had stopped feeding you at one point before. He assumed that meant you had to, I mean, that - that meant cannibalism. To survive. Not because you wanted to.”

“Yeah. It did.”

“But he could never understand why that alone would be enough to - to make you want to burn it all down. So there had to be something more to it. But he could never figure it out.”

“Because _eating_ was never the problem. The problem was that some people didn’t want to eat. And if they chose to die of starvation instead, that would doom all of us for the lack of meat on their bones. So everyone had to eat. Or die.” Octavia looked down at the counter. “And I had to enforce that. I wish it could have been different, but - it was what it was.”

“I’m sorry.” Jordan said, reaching out to rest a hand on Octavia’s. “I - I can’t imagine what that had to have been like. Horrifying. I understand why you wouldn’t want to stay in a place like that. I’m sorry my parents tried to make you.”

“Not your fault. It was a long time ago now.”

“Still. I wish they’d taken the time to understand. If they had, maybe we wouldn’t be here.”

“Then maybe you wouldn’t be at all.”

“Maybe that wouldn’t have been a bad thing.” Jordan looked away, pulling his hand back.

“Jordan. No.” Octavia grabbed his shoulder. “Don’t think that. Don’t _ever_ think that. You’re special. You matter. Don’t ever think you don’t.”

Jordan smiled, but the smile didn’t reach his eyes. “Thanks. But it’ll take me some time to believe that. To process all of this. What’s happened. And people in general.”

“Take your time. I don’t always understand people either. Just know you don’t have to be alone.”

Jordan nodded, and Blythe Ann took that moment to return, handing Jordan a necklace.

“I remember this. She wore it that morning.” Jordan said. “Are you sure?”

“I’m sure.” Blythe Ann said. “You mattered to her, Jordan. I - I don’t know what to have faith in anymore, but I do have to believe that her spirit is still out there somewhere, watching over us.”

“Thank you.”

“Can I get you anything else?”

“Actually… would you happen to have any cookies?” Jordan asked. “We have a friend who could use some.”

“Of course.” Blythe Ann pulled out a small basket and filled it with several handfuls of cookies. She also slipped in a few bottles of the alcohol that Octavia and Jordan were drinking with a wink at both of them. “I’m sure you could use some more of this too. Go, take care of your friend. But know my door is always open, Jordan, if you want to talk about Delilah.”

“Thank you. For everything.” He responded, giving her a short hug over the counter.

Jordan picked up the basket, while Octavia gave thanks of her own to Blythe Ann, and they headed out of the tavern to join Madi, who was still waiting for them on the roof. She got to her feet as they approached.

“We bring treats.” Jordan said, holding the basket out to Madi, who took it warily and peeked inside.

“I stab you, and you bring me cookies?” Madi asked incredulously. “Are they poison?”

Jordan laughed. “No. They’re a peace offering.”

“But I’m the one who stabbed you. Shouldn’t I be the one making a peace offering?”

“I’m choosing to forgive you.” He exchanged a glance with Octavia. “Octavia reminded me that when we lose someone who mattered to us - the only someone we’ve had - that it takes its toll on us. Loss is hard. Especially for people like us. So the best way to cope with it is remembering that we have each other. So, cookies. Which I hope you’ll share, because I don’t think Octavia has had any yet.”

“Of course.” Madi said as they all sat back down. She offered the basket to Octavia, who took a cookie and one of the bottles of alcohol. Jordan took the other bottle and a cookie of his own.

Madi frowned when she saw no more bottles in the basket as she took a cookie. “No drink for me?”

“Clarke and I have had our differences in the past, murderous differences, even, and we’ve gotten through them, but I’m pretty sure she would actually kill me if I gave you alcohol.”

“Please? Just a little. I won’t tell.”

“What’s the harm in a bit?” Jordan asked. “Here. I’m pretty sure Clarke won’t kill me, not when I’ve already almost died once this week.” Jordan handed Madi his bottle and she took a swig from it, coughing as she took too much of a mouthful.

“Ew that’s disgusting.” Madi sputtered, wiping her mouth on her sleeve. “I want more.”

“Oh no, that’s enough.” Octavia said, snatching the bottle out of Madi’s hand and handing it back to Jordan. “Back on Earth, I almost died five times in one week and still Clarke tried to kill me, so don’t underestimate her.”

“Was Earth really that bad?” Jordan asked.

“Not all the time.” Octavia said. “Sometimes it was wonderful.” She opened her bottle, clinking it with Jordan’s before taking a long drink. “Your father’s moonshine was some of the best alcohol I ever had. Until this.”

“But Earth didn’t have these cookies.” Madi mumbled, crumbs spilling out of her mouth as she stuffed more cookies into it. “These make the long nap worth it.”

“Not to mention the fresh air. A lush green planet full of possibilities. No more radiation or melting power plants or anything like that to worry about.” Octavia knocked her shoulder against Jordan’s. “Your parents did good.”

“I just wish they could have seen it. And I hope that peace will be possible.”

“I have to believe that it will be.” Octavia said. “After so much war and pain… there has to be peace.”

“I’m not the Commander anymore.” Madi said, coughing as a few crumbs stuck in her throat. “The Flame is gone. People won’t follow me anymore, and I don’t want them to, not after everything. Octavia?”

“Oh no, I’m not leading anyone either.” Octavia said, taking another drag off her bottle. “No thank you. Not for all the cookies in Sanctum.”

They looked at Jordan in unison, and he held up his hands. “Oh no. Not me.”

“Would be poetic.” Octavia mused, feeling the alcohol starting to go to her head. “The girls under the floor have had their time. Now we can pass the baton to you, the… the…”

“The boy above the ceiling?” Madi giggled, alcohol and cookies getting to her as well. “No, that’s not right. The… the… boy from the sky? The boy from outer space?”

“Just Jordan is fine.” He said with a small smile. “Just Jordan.”

Bit by bit, the cookies in their basket disappeared. Madi burst into another round of tears of guilt as her sugar high dissipated, crying herself out in Octavia’s shoulder. Jordan fell asleep for awhile after he finished his bottle of Jo Juice, clutching Delilah’s necklace, waking up with a start as he relaxed enough that it slipped out of his fingers. He let himself cry for the first time as the sun set, and Octavia and Madi held him as he did, for they understood.

Some hours later, Blythe Ann came looking for her basket, and she found the three of them fast asleep, Jordan propped up awkwardly against the neighbouring house, Octavia asleep on his shoulder, Madi curled into her side. She took the basket and bottles, and returned with some blankets that she tucked around them, motherly instincts a habit she wouldn’t let go of, even if her own child was gone.

She didn’t know what brought these three together - the boy from space her daughter had loved, if only for a night; the fearsome former queen from Earth whose very presence terrified even the others from their world; the child leader who had succeeded her - but something united them, and if in the chaos that their world brought with them they could find peace with each other, then that was the most important thing.

**Author's Note:**

> Title is from “After the Fire” and “Innocence Lost” by Amy Grant.


End file.
